fathering

i'm learning quite abit about myself as i watch my son JT grow up. He is like me in many ways and probably like his mother in many as well. As i've observed his actions, and attitudes i've come to see myself in him. This both pleases me and causes me remorse. I want so much for him and enoch and caspian to grow into godly men yet, i think, "how have i lead or encouraged this?"

One thing i observe is when JT wrestles, i remember doing the same things he does as i constantly lost. These things have not ever been taught to him by me nor by the coaches but he does them, just like I now remember doing them when i wrestled back in 2nd grade. Perhaps he'll stick with wrestling and learn from this or perhaps not. Just as long as he works hard and enjoys it, i'm fine with it. Also, as he is more involved in cub scouts, i see myself represented there as well. He has a keen understanding of those things, much like i did when i was young, yet i don't ever remember teaching these.

I guess we lean quite a bit more by osmosis then i've ever thought. now i have a new mission. paul tells his followers to follow him AS he follows Christ. I've never said that to anyone but now i realize my children will follow me as i follow Christ. So, how am I following Christ? Please pray for me.